by Samuel Prince @phisammajamma
Most men, myself included are hunters. Like a lion, our lives revolve around a single event, a gladiatorial contest that incentivizes men to go forth and conquer. This event is called the hunt. Many women fail to see this, but it is through the application of this principle, the hunter concept, that will be to the demise or benefit of your relationship.
A hunter will always be in search of prey, something to impose its will upon and conquer. Without something to conquer, the hunter will wander. The hunt is ongoing, as the hunter needs the conquest to thrive. It nourishes them physically, psychologically and spiritually. Without the hunt, the hunter has no purpose.
Women, have you ever been cheated on and it seemed random to you? It was not random; it revolved around the hunt or in this case the lack thereof. Unfortunately the hunter will never vocally tell you that you’re no longer the prize. Unless you pay attention to the physical cues, then you’ll never know until it’s too late. These cues are different for each man, variants from their baseline behavior, but that is a conversation for another day.
As a woman, it is important to always give the hunter something to chase. That doesn’t mean be pompous or arrogant. A lofty personal isn’t becoming at all.
In the beginning of a relationship, the original hunt revolves around sexual desire. It is this desire and tension that fuels the hunt. This is hunting on its most basic and primitive level. Many women rely on their attractiveness and sexual ability to fuel the hunt, and while that may work for a while, it is not sustainable in the long term. Looks are fleeting. By the time you’re into your late 30’s and 40’s, those looks will have undoubtedly faded (generally speaking), making this particular method obsolete. As your relationship develops, you have to give your man something new to hunt.
Encouraging and supporting higher education, career goals, entrepreneurship, retirement preparedness, financial stability and health awareness are just some of the many alternative hunts.
Also, you can never give a man something to hunt that he will likely never be able to catch. This is discouraging and quenches the hunt. This often happens when women get pregnant, having babies with men out of wedlock. It is inconceivable to expect a man who has yet to mature, to engage in the hunt of providing for a family when he cannot provide for himself. He will likely leave you; hence the high number of single mother led households.
At all times it’s important to remember to never give your man something to hunt that he likely won’t catch. This takes you being realistic and rational.
Finally, nobody can ever catch ghosts. Daddy issues. Lingering issues from old relationships. Inferiority Complexes. These are all ghosts and they cannot be caught by anybody but you.
Lastly, resist the urge to tell your man how to hunt. Not giving him space to hunt emasculates him. Eventually he will begin to look to you for answers, abdicating his role as a man. That’s not going to work if you ever want your man to be a man, and not a boy. Boys look to their parents. Men find solutions.