Why Sex before Marriage Probably Isn’t a Good Idea

By Sam Prince

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Have your parents ever warned you against sex before marriage? Hopefully they did, especially if your parents are devout Christians like mines. Growing up I recall reading countless scriptures about fornication, and sex out of wedlock.

That didn’t stop me.

Like many of my peers, I sowed my wild oats. The scriptures were just words in a book, printed on a sheet of paper, written by somebody who lived thousands of years before me. I couldn’t connect to them.

So, I’m not going to bark scriptures at you and expect to change your mind. If you’re anything like me, they’ll just be words on a sheet of paper to you too.

That being said, I have an extensive track record of crash and burn relationships, all from which I have learned a few things about sex before marriage. Read them below.

Sex Creates a Lifelong Bond

“I can have heartless, detached sex and be unaffected.” Have you ever heard any of your friends make this claim, or one similar to it? Well, unless your friend has early-onset amnesia (God-forbid), then they are in denial.

To have heartless, detached sex and be unaffected, one has to never reflect on their life. A person has to never look in the mirror, and ponder the consequences of their actions. To never reflect on your life might indicate the presence of a mental or emotional development issue, certainly therapy may be needed.

The result of sex is a lifelong bond between two people. Think of a time that you’ve stopped at the store for groceries, or the mall for clothes, accidentally running into an ex-partner. It’s a bit awkward. The bond you share is undeniable. Your increased heart rate and sweaty palms is your body confirming this.

Sex Creates Role Confusion

Sex creates role confusion between unmarried couples. Sex is symbolic. It represents a commitment two people make, a commitment to creating life. What bigger commitment is there than to have a child?

Here’s the problem. If a couple has yet to commit to one another (which is a legally binding marriage), then how can they commit to a child?

The Benefits of Waiting

Sex is fun, but delayed gratification is worth it. Forget the whole purity discussion. I know you’re tired of hearing that your future husband/wife is waiting for you, and deserves to have you pure.

Let’s talk money. Think about it. Sexual promiscuity costs money, money where your only return on investment is often sex. Money that is used for luxuries and expenditures could be funneled into a savings account, stocks, a 401K, a home, or other markets that will give you a return on investment.

Are you convinced yet? Sex outside of marriage is playing with fire. I’m not telling you to call up your significant other and break off your relations, nor am I telling you to run off and get married. My hope is that before you put yourself in a position to have sex out of wedlock, you think of the ripple effect it may cause. It’s not only your future that you should be concerned with, but also that of your family and your partner.


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